To My Talented Friends Who Knit

Can you please make me one of these crocheted trees? I know knitting and crocheting are different...yet they are the same, right? Either way, you should get started soon, *cough* Katie and *cough* Leah. I'll need to put it up around mid-November. I would prefer to have a pair, but is that asking too much? Many thanks!

Reprimand

I got scolded at Anthropologie. I thought the people who worked there were all peace and love and one world, one heart. Um, no. While Sara, Amy, and I were there on Saturday (Lenox Mall, Buckhead), we saw a really cool, what do you call it, sculpture? It was a contraption of branches and paper cut and folded to look like flowers, and it was hanging above the register. Amy thought it would be cool to do something similar for a party story. So Sara told me to take a picture. I took one shot, and as I was zooming in to take another, out of the corner of my eye I saw a woman waving frantically. I thought she was being silly, trying to wave at the camera, so I gave the obligatory half smile and kept on framing the shot. And then I hear her say to Amy, "She can't take pictures in here."

What. Ever. Lady, please. You don't have a copyright on branches and paper. And besides, anything we create at The Magazine is going to look way awesomer than yours. That's right. Awesomer.

Amy just looked at her, like, um, yeah, not this girl's mom, don't even know her. And I said, "Uhhh, okay. I'll just delete them." Followed by, "Or not," muttered under my breath.

Come on. If I worked at Anthropologie, I would be SO embarrassed that I just caused a scene to tell some girl she couldn't take a photo of sticks and paper.

So I'm posting a shot here. Come get me! I ain't scared.



AND, today I find out that Anthropologie is owned by the same parent company as Free People, and Free People has a blog about store displays, ideas, and the like. So here it is, people, steal away.

http://blog.freepeople.com

Losers.

My Opinion is...

The McDonald's biscuit commercial is stupid. It's the one where the girl talks about getting up super early to prepare scratch-made biscuits. What? Is the phrase not, "made from scratch?" Why do we have to change it up to something dumb? "Scratch-made" sounds ridiculous and also kind of gross.

Am I alone in this one?

Definitely Not Charmin

Lord, this is a doozy. So earlier at work I had to make a stop at the restroom.

I bet I've really grabbed your attention now.

Anywho, I did what I needed to do, and only then did I notice that both toilet paper rolls were empty. Y'all, it was too late! There was no one in the bathroom with me. I sat there a few minutes, but no one came in. I mean, yeah, asking a stranger for TP is a tad awkward, but I'd rather have a red face than, oh, say, tinkle running down my legs.

Then I thought, "Oh, I'll text Katie." But, oh yeah, I don't bring my cell phone with me to the bathroom. And I couldn't very well shuffle to a different stall with my skirt and my striped undies scrunched down around my knees.

Want to guess what I did? Have mercy, this is probably TMI, but since I can't see your faces, I'll go on. I ripped one of the cardboard rolls off the rod.

Again. Cardboard.

And then I blotted. With the torn up roll. The empty roll. And then I went to a new stall for some, uh, back-up.

Gotta admit, this story is rough (pun, ha ha), but I feel I owe it to my blog faithful to share, no matter the humiliation I suffer.

I Am THAT Person

Boy do I have a good story for y'all. It's so humiliating. The best kind, right?

I ran out of gas. On Hwy. 280. In the center lane. I backed up traffic. People probably cussed me out.

As I was driving to a Super Bowl party on Sunday night, my gas light dinged on. Okay, fine, 40 miles to go. I don't typically try to push it, but it was rainy and gross. Ditto at the time I left to go home. Monday morning, no time to fill up, drove to work. Monday after work, talking on cell phone, drove right past gas station and on to Chappy's to meet Sean for dinner.

On the way home, at the red light by Rocky Ridge Road, I was a no-go. I was thisclose to the Chevron. Dang it. That is a bad, bad feeling, my friends.

Oh yeah. I did. Are you laughing? Because it gets better. You'll probably pee your pants.

A sheriff pulled up behind me. With his LIGHTS on. SO embarrassing, y'all, to have to tell the sheriff that, yes, help is on the way, and, no, your battery isn't dead. You're just too stupid to stop and put some gas in your vehicle.

He was super nice while we waited on Sean to deliver some gas. OH, and then, in the left lane, a Tahoe totally slammed into an Accord. The sheriff said, "Let me go make sure they're okay, but then the Mtn. Brook police can handle that one. I'm on my way to Irondale to get a prisoner." I'm sorry those two people had an accident, but I was kind of glad for a distraction from all those evil looks peeps were giving me.

Tomorrow, I hire a driver.

Buckwheat "Buck" Gibson, September 1993-February 2, 2008

Our poor little family dog was diagnosed with lymphoma just days ago, and we put him to sleep on Saturday. It was awful and sad but there was just nothing more that could be done. The doctor said the best he could do was keep him on fluids in the hospital for maybe a week, and that wasn't fair to him. He was so very pitiful and just barely alert, but I know he knew we were there. I'm glad we stayed with him during the entire process.

We miss you, Buck.

Too Good to Pass Up

My sister just emailed me this. It really happened. At Walmart. Someone called to order a cake for a going-away party. I suppose the customer ordered the wording on the cake like this.

"Hello, I'd like to order a cake for a going-away party. I'd like it to say, 'Best Wishes, Suzanne,' and, underneath that, 'We Will Miss You.' "

Well, this is the cake she got.

Why I'll Never Be Out of Work

Because there are people like this, out in our world, spreading their dumbness.

This is a review for a dress I was looking at on the Macy's Web site.

"This was a great buy! I like the fit. The fabric is soft and not itchy. If you have curves, this is a sheek way to show them off because its very streamlined and the sitch waist belt gives it a modern and "put together without trying to hard" look."

Score. I was looking for a sheek dress with a sitch waist belt. You know, for something different.

Caught!

Do you sing and dance in your car? No? Well then stop reading now. You won't appreciate this gem.

I was scooting down the road the other night, listening to a CD I burned from my iTunes account, singing my little heart out. I had the hand mic thing going and everything.

So my favorite song comes on, and I busted into my usual routine. I listen to this song at least once a day, and I get. Really. In. To. It. I have hand motions and facial expressions. I'm like one of Gladys's Pips.

That's right. It's "Midnight Train to Georgia." (Yeah, favorite)

Somewhere between "Said I'm goin' back," and "I'd rather live in his world...than live without him in mine," I pulled up to a stoplight. And as I was leaning in to my second "hoo hoo," moving my arm up and down like I was pulling a horn (you know, the way you signal a semi driver to honk on the Interstate), I looked over and saw the car stopped next to me.

My, my. Weren't they amused.

I should have been embarrassed, I know. But sadly, I was not. I got amused right back. And then I kept right on a-singin'.

I'm Very Much Alive

Despite a Spam message that I got at work stating that I had died.

Yes, you can imagine my shock.

It was obviously a scam, as the email was poorly written and was explaining that someone else was trying to claim my "check." All I had to do was pay a small fee to collect it for myself instead.

Yeah.

Here's the email. It's awesome. (Sorry for the all caps, but that's how it came and I don't want to retype it.)

ATTENTION;

I AM SORRY TO TELL YOU IF THIS IT'S NOT TRUE.

WE RECEIVED AN EMAIL FROM A LADY CALLED, MISS CAROL BECKY, SHE CALLED US YESTERDAY WITH THIS TELEPHONE NUMBER:8668623100 IFORMING US THAT YOU ARE DEAD SINCE LAST YEAR, SHE SAID THAT WE SHOULD SEND HER YOUR CHEQUE TO HER HOME ADDRESS: 1011 S 7TH ST. WATERTOWN, WI 53094, USA, BECAUSE SHE IS YOUR NEXT OF KIN BENEFICIARY TO YOU, AND SHE ALSO TOLD US THAT YOU INSTRUCTED HER TO CLAIM YOUR PROPERTIES INCLUDING YOUR MONEY IN CASE YOU ARE NOT HERE TO BE FOUND ON EARTH.

SHE DID ALSO SAID SHE KNEW SHE WAS GOING TO SPEND SOME MONEY TO GET THE CHEQUE BECAUSE YOU TOLD HER SOMETHING LIKE THAT AND I SHOULD LET HER KNOW THE COST, PLEASE LET THE APEX COURIER COMPANY VERIFY IF THIS IS TRUE OR NOT BECUASE I CONFUSED NOW ABOUT THIS CLIAMS'YOU ARE ADVICE TO SEND YOUR ADDRESS TO APEX COURIER COMPANY FOR THEM TO PROCEED ON YOUR DELIVERY BUT FOR YOUR INFROMATION YOU ARE TO PAY FOR THE PROCESSING FEE WHICH WILL NOT COST YOU MUCH YOU ARE ADVICE TO SEND YOUR ADDRESS AND CONTACT TELEPHONE NUMBER TO THE APEX COURIER COMPANY FOR THEM TO PROCEED ON YOUR DELIVERY OF YOUR CHEQUE WITHOUT ANY DELAY CONTACT APEX DELIVEY COMPANY IMMEDIATELY. FIND BELOW THE CONTACT DETAILS OF THE APEX COURIER COMPANY.

I Missed Out on Free Chicken

I was over in a different part of town the other night, and I missed my turn. I needed to turn around, and I did so at new-looking shopping area that included a Chick-fil-A. It looked really new, and upon closer inspection, I realized it wasn't open yet. And people were camping out. I bet there were 20 tents in the parking lot, and guys were throwing a football around, there was a lady jogging laps, and several people flinging a Frisbee.

I tried to take a picture for y'all, but it didn't turn out.

I called my sister after I noticed that the CFA opened the very next day, and she informed me that every time a new CFA opens, they have a contest and the first so-many people get free chicken for a year.

365 days.

And I missed out. Of all people, I deserve free Chick-fil-A for a year! My $50 in gift cards that I got for Christmas (plus three of the calendars) will be gone in February!

Snowy, Snowy Day

And Here's Why the North is Laughing At Us

Here are the very helpful tips Brooke Smith (the Bachelor contestent-turned-traffic girl) had to offer to Alabamians driving in the snow today.

1. slow down
2. brake gently
3. use your low beams
4. exercise caution on bridges and overpasses
5. do not use your cruise control
6. leave plenty of distance between your car and the car in front of you

Why I Love the South

Yes, everyone, it is snowing at my house! I have to admit, I bounded out of bed this morning at 7 expecting 2 to 3 inches, and I was really upset to see wet pavement and yellow grass. But about 9:15 or so, a steady stream of flurries started to fall. It's sticking just a little now.

But on to the point of this post. On the news a short while ago, a reporter was on location in Verbena, Alabama. There's a layer of snow on the ground, and it's very pretty. The camera showed a few shy townspeople who waved from underneath their heavy coats and hats.

And then this sweet old man came on camera, offered the reporter a plate of pies, cakes, and warm snacks, and invited her to an outdoor gospel sing-along in the park that evening. ha ha. Omg. It was so cute.




Photos: Taken from inside my apartment through the window.

Another Semi Tried to Kill Me

Oops. Tonight, on the Interstate, I kind of cut off a semi. The SUV in front of the semi had just cut me off, and then I realized my lane was exiting, so moved over to the left. I really thought I had plenty of room, but suddenly, that semi was barreling toward me, flashing his lights. I dang near ran myself off the road.

Sooo-oo-ry.

But he shouldn't have been driving that fast anyway. It was raining.

Make. It. Stop.

Alrighty. It's cold and rainy (not snowy) and I had a long day at work. And my head was hurting. But I had to go to Michael's for one little thing. And the second I walked through the door, I heard this little girl crying. Wailing. Having a meltdown. The closer I got to my aisle, the louder she got. I passed by the entire family. Mom scanning the rows of products, totally oblivious. Little son wandering around. Dad holding offending girl, softly cajoling her.

And this is where I got mad. The girl wasn't hurt. I looked for blood. Because the way she was carrying on, I felt sure a finger must be severed or something. The dad was trying to reason with her. But she just got louder. I'm not kidding you, this went on for more than 10 minutes. And I know it was fake because the less attention she got, the louder she got.

Now, I don't have children, but I can't imagine that I'll let my kid pitch a fit like that for more than two seconds before we're out the door. There were two adults. Why didn't someone take her out to the car?

I'm pretty sure, too, that I won't have that little chip that makes a parent unaware of their child's annoying screaming.

And just when I remembered my resolution to be a nicer person, reasoning in my mind that perhaps, just maybe, that little girl truly had a reason to be behaving the way she was, the cashier looked at me, rolled her eyes, and said, "It's time for them to go."

Amen.

Ring, Ring

My parents gave my grandmother a cell phone for Christmas. After she opened it, my brother went into the hallway to call her. It was so loud with everyone talking and the kids laughing, but Grams sat in her chair, pretending to have a conversation. It went like this.

Grams: Hello? Hello?

Zach: Hey, Grams.

Grams: Hello?

Meanwhile, Zach can't hear her, hangs up the phone, and walks back behind her chair.

Grams: Hello? Okay. Okay. (Nods her head.)

Zach: Grams?

Grams: Yeah?

Zach: Who are you talking to?

It cracked up all of us, even her. After things quieted down, my dad taught her how to use it.

Happy Christmas!

Well this is a bit late, but better than never.

Dreaming of a White...Thursday

There is a very slight, teeny-tiny, almost not there chance of wintry weather Wednesday night. I know that Richard Jacks said not to put any stock in it right now, but still. I'm excited. We haven't had any icy, snowy, or otherwise close-work-worthy weather in a long time, and I could use a snow day. I can't help it, my hopes are up.

This photo is from last weekend. It was really cold, this fountain out in front of The Tavern was frozen solid, and I was hopeful. But the skies were clear.

Book Pick

I just finished reading this book by a girl who used to work in our Foods dept. She now works at another magazine. I don't really know her, but I was curious about the book, and they were having a signing at work last week. I read it in three days! I thought it was good, and like any good book, it left me wanting a little more. I recommend it.

Bu-bye

The music on the slide show was annoying me. It is now gone.

Ouch

Monday night, as I was leaving the Y (hooray for resolutions!), I walked right into a tree branch. Totally scratched my face beneath my left eye. It was sort of darkish, and I guess I wasn't really paying attention to what I was doing. I tried to play it off, but my instinctual duck-and-swat probably gave me away. Thankfully I just had a little red mark that disappeared later that night.

Welcome to Arby's, Mama

The other day I abandoned my task of taking down Christmas decorations to run to Arby's. I placed my order, and when I got up to the window, the following exchange took place.

Arby's lady: "How you doin', mama. That'll be $5.19."

Me: "Um, fine, thanks. Here you go."

Arby's lady (referring to my tea): "Sweet or unsweet, baby?"

Me: "Unsweet, please."

Arby's lady: "You need some sugar, Equal, Sweet-N-Low?"

Me: "Yes, Sweet-N-Low."

Arby's lady: "What color is that? Pink? Gotta help me out, baby. How many?"

Me: "Two."

Arby's lady: "Here's a bunch. Just keep them in your car or something."

The part that stuck out most in my head? Why the heck did she call me "mama?"

Back to the Red

I got a pedicure after Christmas and (gasp!) the place didn't have any Lincoln Park. So I'm sporting a little Dutch Tulips again. No worries, though, I'm prepared now. I got a bottle of the dark stuff in my stocking.

Funny Kid

This is my cousin Caitlyn who lives in Florida. She spent the night with us one time during the holidays. She wanted to stay up late, and I finally got her to agree to lay down by putting in a video. Two minutes later, I looked over and asked if she could hear the tv. Caitlyn waited a second, set up, leaned over to me, and said, "Shh! I'm asleep." Easy enough.

She is, however, a little confused that Sean and I are married but don't have any babies yet.

Scare-olers

So I collect Byer's Choice Carolers, which Sean has dubbed "Scare-olers" because of their Scream-style faces. I was first in line to get a few new ones at 50% off the day after Christmas. I've never been first, but the store opened an hour later than usual, so people were waiting in their cars because it was cold. I got out and started the line. It was longer than ever this year.




Here is my current collection of Carolers and the two new ones I scored. I really wanted the man holding the little girl. The man holding the tree was a bonus. One lady tried to take a Caroler out of my hand, but I won.

Our Rockin' New Year's Eve

We spent the last night of 2007 in Atlanta, eating at Two Urban Licks with friends. We ate great food, acted the fool, and rang in 2008 with plenty of laughter.

Warning: I added some Fergie to this slideshow. I think it may be a video with music, but I really meant to only do the song. Oops.

Happy New Year!

I hope to post lots and lots of holiday photos tonight. Sorry for the absence! You all are due some serious posting.

Cheers for a happy, healthy, and prosperous 2008!

The Nightmare That is Wal-mart

I am not a Wally World hater. In fact, I love the place. I can get groceries, electronics, toiletries, crafts supplies, and light bulbs, all while having my oil changed and the tires rotated. Oh, and at a discount. Sorry, but I'm a big fan.

I was disappointed the other night, though, when I wheeled my buggy into an enormously long line. There were only about 10 lanes open. At 9:30 p.m. On the Friday before Christmas. If Sam were alive, he would've been ticked.

The lady in front of me was doing ALL of her Christmas shopping. I was mighty impressed that she did this for $313. But back to my story.

So the cashier was moving slower than a snail, and I was determined NOT to get frustrated, even as my orange sherbet was melting away. She was casually scanning groceries and bath mats, sloooowly bagging each item. Finally it was my turn. She greeted me, and I presumed we were about to get going. And then...

Y'all. She started refilling her plastic bag station. WHAT THE? She wasn't in any hurry either. It was totally like the movements when you put a DVD on "slow." Oh, friends, I about had a meltdown.

Let me also add that the lady in line behind me (and her two teenage daughters) were really pressing my buttons. First off, the mom was really pushing me. Like, she kept inching her cart right up on me. And she was standing way too close to me. When I moved up in line, her girls got all up in my grill, and they were leaning over the conveyor belt, getting gum, and like, lolling on my groceries. An elbow totally smashed my bread. And they were examining my purchases too. Butt out, nosy teens.

Here's the best part. When slow checkout lady finally finished, I reached for my debit card, and when I turned back to the swiper thing, the lady was RIGHT UP BEHIND ME. Like, if I put my hand on my hip, she'd have taken a hard jab to the gut. She was bending down reading something, so she said, and she had pushed her buggy all the way up alongside mine. I couldn't even get around my buggy to load the rest of my bags.

I don't know if you can picture this exactly as it happened, but let me tell you, I just about blew up on her. And for those of you in my family who know me well, you know I was twitching trying to control myself. I was all hot and bothered.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Family Chaos, The Good Kind

Tonight was crazy, but fun. We had lots of fam over for dinner. I'm so tired my eyes will barely stay open, but I took lots of pictures tonight and at our brunch yesterday, so I promise to post lots soon. Tomorrow and Tuesday will be so busy, but hopefully after that things will calm down!

Here's a funny little story. Tonight my 4-year-old cousin Caitlyn was teasing my brother, and I told her to ask where her Christmas present was. Zach told her it was in the mail. She prissed back into the kitchen and told us, "He said it's in the mail. It must be a gift card."

I'm sorry. That's funny.

Oh Bring Us a Figgy Pudding

And bring it right now!
Merry Christmas!

Disclaimer: I didn't come up with this idea. I copied it.

Ornament Swap Slideshow

Photographs: Katie Bowlby

Happy Birthday

We got the Bonafe at Cafe Bottega to celebrate Sean's birthday. We didn't have any left, it was so good! Some kind of banana-toffee-caramel dessert.

I kept making Sean pose for pictures that I took myself. I'm trying to use the camera!!

Wreath: Finished

It's not perfectly round, but that just adds to the character.

Worst. Christmas Song. Ever.

Snowflakes of Love, Toni Braxton.

Somebody should've told that girl no.

Only in Alabama

I can barely handle the angel wishes on one of our local radio stations. These people always tell such sad stories about people in need, and then Rob and Shannon give them Visa gift cards. Different stories get different amounts. The stories always make me cry while I'm driving down the road.

The other day, as I was drivin' and cryin', this lady was asking for help for a family. The dad had been out of work, then he got a job, but soon after that he was hospitalized and hadn't been able to go to work.

He was shot because he and his mama had a falling-out, and he went over to her house but she thought she was an intruder. So she shot him. With her shotgun. On the front porch.

I'm sorry, it's still sad, but this could only happen down South. Right?

PS: The man is okay, and Rob and Shannon gave the family $500 in gift cards. All is good. No word on whether or not mama and son mended their rift.

Bell Ringers

Yesterday I saw two of the most exuberant Salvation Army bell ringers ever. One guy outside Walmart was yelling, "MERRY Christmas! HAP-py NEW Year." He was talking really fast, sing-songing the whole way through. It was pretty funny. On the other end of the store another bell ringer was super enthusiastic as well. When I responded to his greeting with, "Fine, how are you," he gives me this: "Oh, I'm fantastic, just enjoying this wonderful, beautiful, magnificent day that our Lord Jesus has given to me."

Which is nice. But he couldn't get it out fast enough, and it just got awkward. I was in a hurry, and I had to stop and wait about five minutes for him to finish. He might consider removing one of the adjectives.

The bell ringer at Sam's was much more sedate. I think he was tired.

Burnin' Rubber

I got a tad scared last night. Well, more than a tad. Kind of like, omgImightwetmypants scared. So I was driving to meet Sean at Cantina last night, and I made a turn and was approaching a red light. There was a lot of activity on the street, people running out to their cars and such, which is unusual. Anyway, there was a line of cars waiting to turn left, so I went around them and pulled up to the light to go straight.

All the sudden the dude in the truck next to me started revving his engine, and smoke was everywhere. I didn't want to look at him, so I just prayed the light would turn green quickly. Next thing I know, he peels out and runs the light. Suddenly about four cars were revving and then they all ran the red light. Tires were squealing and everyone was fishtailing after the turn. I have no idea what was going on. But I didn't like it.

Update

I found the freakin' key last night. I dumped out my purse (again) because it was clearly time to purge. And stuck inside the flap of my Charlie Brown Christmas CD, there it was. Whew.

I checked everything very closely to make sure nothing was stolen. My Santa ornament was still on the tree. The little yellow taxi bank I have was empty, but then again, it always is.

Bad Morning

So. I took my house key off of my key ring this weekend so my mom could use it. All the copies of our key have disappeared. Anyway, I locked the door with my loose key yesterday, threw it into my purse (I thought), and went about my day. I didn't need my house key last night because Sean used his. This morning, when I got ready to leave (almost on time!), I couldn't find the key anywhere. I dumped out my purse contents. Nothing. I had to leave.

On my way to work, I called the leasing office to see if they could run over and lock the door. They could, however, they were having trouble cracking the code to open up the key vault. They were working on this problem and promised to lock the door when they got access to their keys.

If any of you would like to steal from us, today's the day.

Leave Your Poll Comments Here!

Per reader request, here's the forum for your poll comments, past and present.

Buckwheat

This is our dog, Buck, and my brother, Zach. I wasn't able to catch him in uniform this weekend, but this is pretty sweet. Buck is 14 years old and he's having trouble seeing, hearing, and with his thyroid. It's sad. He misses Zach since he moved out a few weeks ago, but Zach comes back to visit him often.

Photo Shoot

Here's a sample of what we shot at my parents' kitchen on Monday. It's the first time I've really created something for a shoot! I didn't do it all myself, but a lot of it!

Tiny Wreaths

My sister made fun of this house in our neighborhood in Georgia because these wreaths on the front of the house are so small. In her words, "Why bother?" ha ha.

Trying to Spend $45

I got a letter in the mail last week telling me I had a little more than $45 left in my Flex account. I can pay for doctor copays and prescriptions, but also over-the-counter stuff too. If you don't use all the money by the end of the year, you lose it. I thought I had spent all mine. Anyway, I loaded up at Target last night. I spent $30 on Tylenol daytime liquid, Alka-Seltzer Severe Cold Nighttime, Zicam tablets, and Zicam Nighttime. I'm either going to get better or pass out from all the meds.

Now, if I hadn't had that "free" $45, I would've bought the Target brand daytime/nighttime combo for $4.99 and called it a day.

Sniff, Cough

I'm home sick today. Nasty, rotten cold. It's bad. But Katie thought blogging would lift my spirits. I tried to post a few photos, but there is something wrong with Blogger, so I can't. I will tell you, though, that there is nothing like the chicken soup from Carrabba's to make you feel better. I lucked out yesterday because they actually had it. Usually it's Lentil and Sausage, but Sean called to tell me it was chicken. Next time you're sick, try it!

Little Bit More Christmas

Here are a few more decorating shots. I promise I'll get back to interesting stories one day.

A Few More Favorite Things

We have the amazing Gal Pal deodorant removers. These little pads work wonders on all that white stuff that gets on your clothes.

The Days Ago Digital Counters just stick on jars and bottles that you keep in the fridge after you open them (spaghetti sauce, salad dressing) Then you can easily tell what day you opened the item. Usually I just have to wait for the mold.

Both available at The Container Store.

These lappers are great trays that a lady from my hometown invented. The silicone pads stick on where your plate and cup go. You can tilt the trays up to a 45-degree angle, and dishes won't move. Way cool. www.lappergirl.com

And, just for fun, these cute candy cane glasses make a cool gift. They are festive and cute and would go perfectly with my red dishes from Pier 1. www.surlatable.com.

How is This Better?

I don't understand the marketing here. The new 2x Concentrated Gain is on the shelves, and the company says it takes half as much detergent to do a load of laundry. But the new bottle is half the size of the old one, the number of loads per bottle is the same, and the price is the same. So, it all evens out. What's the big deal?

Anyone? What am I missing?

Gimpy

I think I have one leg that's shorter than the other. Yesterday I had on a pair of long black pants and some heels. All day long, one pant leg kept getting stuck in the back of my shoe. It was so annoying. But it was just the one leg. I think it must be longer than the other, and therefore that pant leg is shorter. The other pant leg fell down below the shoe a little more, and it wasn't getting stuck. Then I started walking funny to stop it from happening, which only made things worse.

Maybe I can take this circus show on the road.

Warning: PG-13 Post

Y'all might not find this as funny as my sister, mom, and I did, but I'll tell you anyway. I'm already tearing up just thinking about this story. In Nashville after Thanksgiving we stopped at this little clothing store. It was kind of a bust, but we were checking it out anyway, being polite, when my mom walked past this here mannequin and knocked the purse off its shoulder. Well, you can see what happened. It just really cracked Laurie and I up. But the best part was that my mom turned around because we were giggling so hard, and at first she didn't get it. And we couldn't quit laughing long enough to tell her. So she finally notices and tells my sister and I we're being silly, only she can't stop laughing either. Then I, thinking of my blog readers, whip out my camera to capture this on film. And by then one of the employees totally noticed us and was craning her neck to check out the commotion. My face was flaming red and hotter than a furnace.

But, come on, guys. Wasn't it worth it? I bet you're laughing a little too.

Merry Christmas Indeed

Today my friend Leah's much-anticipated Christmas package arrived on my doorstep. Leah and her husband, Heinz, have been living in New York for the past year and a half, and she does much freelancing at various magazines. She gets to go to beauty sales where she always scores fantastic stuff. And then she sends it to her friends down South. Here's a photo of what I just got. Yes, by the way, my rule is that if a gift arrives in the mail, you do not have to wait till Christmas to open it. This was my "Happy December 1st" gift. Besides all the makeup and products, she sent two awesome handmade Christmas cards and homemade cookies. She's a phenom.

Thanks, Leah!!

If You Live Up North...

This stocking stuffer is for you. Even when we do get snow down here, it's usually not enough for a snowman. But this is super cute and fun for kids. Or kidlike adults. Whichever. Kit includes: eyes, corn cob pipe, button nose, and a hat. Get it at www.plumparty.com.

And take a picture for me.

Shellfish Shooters

This was pretty cool. At Abacus in Dallas they have something called Lobster Shooters. The waitress brought our lobster dumplings in sake cups, and then she poured a coconut-curry sauce on top. We drank/ate them in one gulp, just like a shot. They were really good. Too bad I can't say the same for the salty sea bass.


For dessert I had Godiva Chocolate Soup. I ate it before I had a chance to take a picture. I think you can all imagine how divine it was, though.

After dinner the courtesy Mercedes R350 from the hotel picked us up. We thought we were ballin'. Actually, maybe it was just me. But whatever, it was fun. And free.