Wednesday, October 15, 2008

A Letter

Dear CVS of Crestline Village:

You obviously need my services. You see, I am a copy editor. An individual who holds correct grammar and factual information in high esteem. It's what I do for 7.5 hours a day. I check behind people. Here's a simple lesson for you. If your store closes at 8 p.m., it is misleading—no, downright wrong—to post the closing time as 8:30 p.m. on your Web site. Because then people like myself, always operating at the eleventh hour but with the best of intentions, will show up to pick up a VIP prescription and a bottle of much-needed Zyrtec at 8:15 p.m., only to pull frantically at a bolted-shut door like a lunatic while mouthing to the very surprised stock boy, "Are y'all closed?" as he nods his head. Clearly, yes.

Sincerely,
Stephanie, your slightly more crazy and hive-ridden customer

9 comments:

Unknown said...

It's like that auto part commercial, where the kid shows up on his bike with the radiator hose, waves it in the air, and the nice employee lets him in. You should have just waived your empty bottle! The nice stock boy might have. . .

Wait, you're right.

Natalie said...

Steph... you work 7.5 hours a day? Or you "work" 7.5 hours a day??

Katie B said...

Oh, ouch Nat! But seeing as this was posted at 11:31 a.m., I suppose you have a point.

Stephanie said...

I think we all know how little, er, much, I "work."

And, haters, I post-dated. Last night.

Unknown said...

hahahahahahah 7.5 hours

Katie B said...

Hello? You gotta post-date during nonworking hours!

Stephanie said...

Hey! I DO work!

And I didn't know people were watching my post times! Sheesh.

The Bakers said...

I don't work, so I'm not worried about your time stamp. I am, however, worried that you have lived in the Ham for years and haven't yet learned its most important lesson: Mountain Brook doesn't care about regular people. (I'd like to thank Kanye for the inspiration...)

Stephanie said...

Oh, right. Thanks, Julia, for keepin' it real.