Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Group Therapy, Anyone?

I had an appointment today, and I got to the clinic a little early, so I took a seat in the waiting room. It was sort of late in the afternoon, and there were only a couple people there besides me. A lady walked in soon after, looking slightly disheveled, signed in, and sat down two seats away from me. And then, suddenly, to no one in particular but to everyone in the room, she asked a question.

"Are any of y'all here for the BPD group?"

We all shook our heads no, but one unsuspecting girl said, "That sounds interesting. What is it?"

Uh oh.

"Borderline Personality Disorder. I have it."

"Oh. Um. Wow. That's...well, hmm. Goodness."

"It's terrible. I have lots of issues."

Gulp.

And cue horror movie music.

Disheveled lady launched into an explanation of what, exactly, BPD is. And that's fine, okay? I'm all for some psychiatric help because, Lord knows, we got enough crazies in this world. But, like, you can't just dump that info on perfect strangers in a doctor's office waiting room. Because crazy scares folks. So I just pretended to be fascinated by the Frankenstein marshmallow pops in the latest issue of Paula Deen's magazine.

And then she said: "I'm just so happy to be getting some help."

Yeah, we are too. Only it sounds like you aren't stable yet, so, please. Stop. Scaring. Us.

And I kept my hand firmly gripped on my Swiss Army knife. Because I don't know how those personalities work, but all I could think about is the SheDAISY song Lucky 4 You (Tonight I'm Just Me), and I didn't want #23 comin' after me.

8 comments:

Lisa Williams said...

I always thought of borderline personality disorder as being RIIIIIGHT on the edge.....of actually having one. Karma's gonna get me for that.

(Props on the Shedaisy reference, that song is pure genius.)

Leah said...

Heinz and I think that we know several people who have it. They just have some behavorial issues that can't be fixed with drugs. It just takes a lot of hard work, like therapy.

Andy said...

Haha, if I was doing the movie, the horror music to cue would be Des'ree's "You Gotta Be." I cynically don't know why. Poor disheveled lady.

Andy said...

Steph, where's our updates? No thoughts on the ASU game? The Blackout? I mean, err, oops, the funeral?

stephinbham said...

ha ha. I know, I know. I've been slack. And now I can't take my eyes off this USC game. But I'm all set for the weekend, new black shirt and all. It better be a smackdown.

Andy said...

Recognize those refs? Smack down in Black!!

Bowlby said...

Dudes. I just have to go on record saying the whole black out/white out thing is TIRED. I'm pretty sure Indiana basketball started the trend in 2001, so it's officially SO 5 YEARS AGO.

(Disclaimer: In fact, I have no idea who started it. But I know we were doing it in 2001, so I'm claiming it.)

Bowlby said...

Okay, so 2001 would make that SO 7 YEARS AGO. I'm not so good at the math. But that's even worse!