Hmmm…word choice?

Even though technically "voluptuous" is used correctly in this e-mail ad I received from Sephora for Kim Kardashian's new perfume—which, btw, what?—it just sounds wrong.

And also stupid. Because, in my mind, I read "Kim Kardashian's new curvy, full-figured perfume."

Remind me again why I don't have a job? Thanks.

It's clear, too, why there never will be a StephInBham fragrance that captures the many facets of my personality. No way in the world pickle juice, Chick-fil-A, and a freshly mowed football field is a scent trilogy any woman wants to spritz behind her ears. Oh well, that dream's dead.

(I realize pickle juice, CFA, and football are things I love, not so much parts of my personality. Just go with it.)