Truck Driver

I don't strike y'all as a truck-driving kind of gal, do I? You should've seen me trying to maneuver this thing down the road.

Budding Artist?

First of all, happy belated birthday to my cousin Jessica. She turned 21 Monday. We're all down on St. George Island for the week. We went over to Apalachicola for dinner, then back to play a little Pictionary. Check out Jess's masterpiece below. We didn't get this one. I'll post the answer in the comments.


One hint. When Jessica's sister, Jennifer, yelled out "octupus," Jess said, "close!"

Yeah, not so much. I think Ione has us beat.

At the Beach

And our house doesn't have wireless. Oh, the humanity. I have some good photos to share. Anyway, I'll try to post soon!

Playing

This MacBook is addictive.

My Good Deed

I found some more money tonight. And credit cards. I was putting away my buggy at Target when I noticed someone had left their Coach wallet in another buggy. Coach wallet, I assume, means big bucks inside. And maybe an Amex black. ha ha. I almost just left it there, but then I was afraid someone would come along and steal it. So I walked that wallet all the way back inside to guest services, even though it was time for me to be at Leah and Heinz's house for dinner.

Now see? I am totally a good person.

I Guess Everyone is Cashing In...

On the apple bottom trend. Even Macy's.

I'm a Granny

According to the Wii that is. I took the fitness test. I laughed, scoffed even. I bowled like a [decent] champ. I hit a few tennis balls.

And then I missed Every. Single. Baseball. I didn't hit one. Didn't even come close.

The verdict? I'm 80.

Here's a little perspective. My sister is 59. My grandfather is 43.

If I could capitalize numbers, you would've read that like this: FORTY-FRICKIN'-THREE. MY GRANDDAD.

But I'm newly addicted to the bowling. And I'm good. Got a few turkeys, even. I want a Wii.

I Have a Big Fat Crush

On Bill Hemmer. I've mentioned it before, you know, he goes with my Wedding Bell Blues song. But the flame was recently reignited when I saw him on TV the other morning. Yum. I'm willing to overlook the slight—okay, okay—13-year age difference. Okay, fine. 14 years.

Just My Luck

Yesterday I had to make a quick stop at World Market, and as I got out of my car, I totally spotted a $20 bill on the asphalt. There were no other cars around, no people. Just me and the crumpled up bill. So I took it. Is that wrong? Should I feel bad? Because I don't. I mean, where would one even turn in found money that's in the middle of a deserted parking lot? I'm sure I got captured on hidden camera for one of those shows about people who find stuff and steal it, but I don't think I care.

Alert: New Pet Peeve

Don't you think it's rude when you are standing in a long line at, say, The Hob, and when another register opens, people behind you scurry over to the new short line? Isn't the person next in line to be checked out supposed to be helped first?

Interesting—to me, at least

I've had to factcheck the spelling of "Doritos" twice in the past two months at work. And only one time was I actually working on a recipe. Doritos has a weird site. Check it out.

www.doritos.com

It's a lot of effort for a Web site about chips.

Breast Cancer Isn't Funny

But this bumper sticker is. Especially when you see one on the back of an old lady's Mercedes SUV.

Driving to the Lake

I look like the Unabomber, don't I? It was the only way to keep my hair out of my face and my eyes open. By the way, my grandparents are totally cool—check out their weekend ride!

HA HA HA HA—deep breath—AHA HA HA HA

From People.com

Paris Hilton Making Music with Benji Madden

It's good to have a musical boyfriend.

Benji Madden has already recorded a song about Paris Hilton, and now the Good Charlotte guitarist is helping her with her own music.

Hilton, 27, told E! News that she and Madden, 29, are hard at work on the theme song to her upcoming MTV reality show My New BFF.

"Benji and I have been working hard on it," she said. "He's helping me write the lyrics for the song and then I'll sing it, too."

The couple, who've been dating for four months, are laying down the track at a studio located, conveniently enough, in her Beverly Hills mansion.

Premiering later this year, My New BFF will follow the former Surreal Life star as she chooses a new shopping buddy from 20 contestants.

Hilton also plans to start working on the follow-up to her 2006 debut CD Paris. "I'll have another album come out, for sure," she told E! News. "I just don't know when yet. I only have the summer off, then I'll be taping another season of BFF. But an album is something I'll do."

EDITOR'S NOTE: I will admit to a slight enjoyment of the Stars Are Blind ditty. Slight.

Also, why will she be filming another season of this show? I mean, the whole point is to find a new BFF and stick with her, right?

Amy Wins!

New post title below for the flip flop-pizza fiasco.

Don't Anger the Target Lady

Last night I went to Target to pick up just a few things, so I got a basket instead of a buggy. When I got to the checkout line—and let me say here that the Target on Hwy. 280 never has enough lanes open—I put the basket on the conveyor belt. I wasn't really paying attention, just going through the motions of moving in the line, and when my turn came, I moved on up to the counter and got out my debit card.

As I was fumbling around with my wallet, I heard the cashier sigh heavily and slam a few things out of the basket. I looked up, and all of the sudden, she flipped my basket over on its side with a huge grunt, starting raking stuff out, and then she flipped the darn thing completely upside down. Stuff was rolling everywhere, including glass bottles that were spinning and slamming into the sides of the conveyor platform. I was so stunned I couldn't speak.

Now normally I do unload my basket, but really, does it matter? I mean, either way, she has to pick up my items and scan them, yes? So, sorry, Jessica of Target 280. Didn't mean to put you out. But she better be glad my pickle jar didn't bust everywhere.

Creepy

I took this photo a couple weeks ago when my sister was in town. We were sending a picture message to my brother to see if he liked this shirt because we were trying to decide between it and another one for him. When I took the picture, my phone display only showed the shirt, but when I flipped open my phone, I started laughing. This is just funny to me. Laurie's eyes look so creepy!

Flip Flop Slop

I'll post the most creative suggestion for a title.

Here's the deal. Below is a picture of my new (and cheap!) sandals from Old Navy. I got them at the beach. They're lovely, no?


As you can see, they don't offer much support and little distance between my feet and the ground. No biggie.

Except, as we were strolling around Pier Park at the beach last weekend, I stepped on an uneven part of the pavement, my right foot slipped off the shoe a bit, and my toe sunk into something moist and cold. And when I looked down, I saw that my big toe was encased in a cold slice of pizza someone had dropped on the ground.

People Have Nerve!

I really can't decide who is dumber here: the woman injured by her thong or the lawyer who took her case.

http://www.usmagazine.com/woman-suing-victorias-secret-over-defective-thong+

My favorite part of the Today show interview was when Meredith asked the lady if it was the first time she had worn the thong, or if perhaps it wasn't, and the metal piece had come loose after being washed a few times. Marcrida replied, "No, Meredith, it wasn't the first time, but I have a lot of underwear from Victoria's Secret, and so I had only worn this particular pair a few times."

I'll try to fix the hyperlink from home later.

See Ya Real Soon

I'm at the beach, and I forgot my camera cord. So, nothing till I get back home. But the best news of all is, I'm now posting on my brand-new MacBook!!



photo taken with my phone